Rapture of the Sleep

Scary ghost...by ella

2009-11-08T18:14:00.000-06:00

She had been running around like crazy going "scary ghost says rawr" but of course when the camera came out I had to prompt her.
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So life WAS better...

2009-11-07T10:24:00.000-06:00

Because we decorated! And ye olde plague was lifting! And then, THEN, we met our new neurologist.
I should preface this by stating that Jason and I go through 4 24pks of pop in two weeks. Probably 3 of those, but definitely 2 of them, are Mt. Dew.
Ya'll, my neuro has banned me (ok us, but really, now that withdrawal has kicked in it is every man for himself here) from caffeine. And tylenol and motrin. And I have to have an EEG before she will switch me to a headache preventative/anti-epileptic, like Topamax. Oh, and the med I have been on for nine years now causes osteoporosis. So I have to have a bone density test, as well. I asked if that could explain how I broke my leg when I was 35 weeks with Princess and she just looked at me. So...shit. If I don't post its because I died. Or Jason killed me from his own caffeine withdrawal. Send help. And milky way bars.
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Why Life Sucks Today

2009-11-02T18:36:00.000-06:00

My washing machine that I JUST BOUGHT LAST WEEK (used, but still)-broken. Will be fixed $80 on Friday. So here I am at the laundromat. Again. My old apartment complex? Charging me $1540 for damages that were damaged when I moved in, and the REASON I moved out. And once again, I have been struck with ye olde bubonic plague.
Three words: eff my life.
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Wichita does Halloween right Ya'll

2009-11-01T07:57:00.000-06:00

First, the obligatory kid pics. Then, THEN, we went to College Hill to trick or treat...and let me just tell you, this is the equivalent of going to a Vegas show, or maybe Disneyland. Holy hell, you guys. It was AWESOME. There was so much to see! Tombstone in the front yard with a jack-o-lantern? That's for slackers. We saw a full scale pirate ship coming from a house, complete with mast, rigging, and candy laden pirates. The wicked witch had just crushed her sister and the scare crow and tin man were concerned. Jack and Sally were cavorting in the cemetery. Ghosts were flying and singing. A castle full of mental patients, witches, and mummies gave out candy and theatre info. And a full size mad scientist had a lab and was raising the dead, guarded by a variety of creatures. A HUGE cauldron held a zombie and was observed by a witch, and Shelob the spider guarded her web and a yard of at least fifty jack o lanterns. We were blown away. The best, though, was the animatronic cemetery wit pumpkin head ghosts who sang and danced, generously giving solos to three skeletons. One was in a coffin that popped open, and two literally jumped out of the ground to complete the ensemble. I will enclose as many cell phone pics as it will allow. Enjoy!
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Happy Halloween Eve!

2009-10-30T21:22:00.000-05:00

These aren't princess & wonderboys' actual costumes, but aunt shel and brooklynn sent them some playtoys. I have hidden the candy but obviously the toys are getting a workout! Hopefully more pics tomorrow of them in their other costumes.
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Kansas Skies & Hyperactivity

2009-10-25T20:44:00.000-05:00

Or, how I spent this weekend. When I wasn't working all night or panicking about the fact that we are moving Tuesday, MY GOD WE ARE NOT READY. Anyone want some stuff that may get left behind? I can promise a full array of lego blocks, barbie shoes, and random photos and fridge magnets. YOU KNOW YOU WANT IT.

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Spin Cycle

2009-10-22T10:43:00.000-05:00

So...I don't really cook all that much. Like, ever. The stuff I DO make is really good, but my pussy husband won't eat it. "I don't like alfredo...I don't like pumpkin cheesecake...". Blah blah blah. So I said if he ever wanted to have sex again he had to cook. So he does...after an initial period of resistance in which he found out how serious I was. Ha.
So J makes this, not me. I call it Sweet Baby Jay's BBQ Chicken. He says I'm stupid. But anyway....
3-4 chicken breasts, cut into thirds
1/2 bottle of Sweet Baby Rays bbq sauce (get it? GET IT?)
1 cup onion/pepper/celery mix that's at walmart in the freezer aisle
Black pepper to taste

Defrost chicken according to weight, cut into thirds, boil for 20 minutes. When you can touch it without scalding yourself shred the chicken and layer with bbq sauce, veggies, and pepper. Mix it then bake at 450 for 14 minutes.
It makes a ton, ya'll. And then we go southern fried and add cheddar and pickles and eat it on toast.
Enjoy!
P.S. Einstein says will work for chikin.
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Mmmm thai iced tea

2009-10-21T15:30:00.000-05:00

We are currently at a thai restaraunt in wichita that looks a little...adventurous, if you get me? But oh, my God, ya'll. The food is AMAZING. A d the thai iced tea is actually good. Mmmm. If you are ever in wichita try Taste of Thai on St Francis. You're welcome.

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Sometimes all you can say is "yes, my daughter is wearing Hulk underwear."

2009-10-20T14:02:00.000-05:00

Sometimes kids irritate the crap out of me. Mine, yours, my patients, WHATEVER, they are children and therefore irritating. This doesn't happen often but when it does I just need to take a step back. A bad thing about being a pediatric nurse, at least for me, is the survivor's guilt. If Wonderboy is having a bad adhd day I tell myself "Jesus Tif, get a grip. I bet so-and-so's mom would be ecstatic with an adhd diagnosis instead of the one for METASTATIC CANCER, you ungrateful bitch." and when that happens I get hit with the bone chilling certainty that any child, any time, is susceptible to some sort of horrible diagnosis, accident, parent. And I feel bad on multiple levels-for them, their families, myself. Myself for always thinking the worst thing (leg pain? ITS CANCER!) instead of just chilling and enjoying my kids. Its not healthy to berate myself for getting irritated constantly because of what I see at work. Its not fair to my kids. It just freaks me out and makes the guilt/irritability cycle worse and causes 2 a.m. anxiety attacks where I cry for getting on to them-never mind that they deserved it-and I just want to pull their sleeping selves out of bed and kiss them and apologize.
But then somedays, most days, I look at my kids and just love them. And while I wish it were everyday that I was a better parent, I just have to remind myself that parenting, like medicine, is a practice. And kiss my kids and take pictures of them in their leggings and brother's underwear. Over the leggings. Because this is how we roll.
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2009-10-20T05:56:00.000-05:00

Pedro is wondering if the mobile blogging is working...
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oh hey. so, it's been awhile

2009-09-08T03:16:00.002-05:00

so.....*whistles aimlessly*....
meet some of my family! this is my awesome cousin jeff and his way cool wife, tish, and their new baby (squee) logan. he is MADE OF AWESOME. and makes my ovaries hurt. in a good way. you know what i mean.
and....
that's pretty much it.
edited to add: you know w hat would also rock? IF I GAVE YOU THEIR LINK MY GOD I AM STUPID. it's ok, you can say it. i was thinking it, too. they live here.

OH, AND AAAANNNNNDDDDRRRRREEEAAAAA! I HAVE MISSED YOU, TOO! I also kind of wanted to put "adrian" instead of your name because latent Rocky references crack me up.

shhh...

2009-08-21T04:13:00.004-05:00

ok, so just real quick.
since a few key bloggers i read have PUSSED OUT ON ME (ahem, black hockey jesus and looky daddy) i had to redo my blog stalking list. soo. wha-la. here it is.
and no, i'm not at work right now. why do you ask?
ahem.
p.s. we got a dog. named einstein. but he has already learned to answer to captain dumbass. will show pics later. but he's a white mini schnauzer. and he's uber cute. and i may or may not have laughed HYSTERICALLY when he chased ella down the hall and pulled off her "biaper."
no. she isn't potty trained. quit looking at me.
how are you?

i think i can...

2009-07-30T06:50:00.001-05:00

Oh holy crap I am blogging from my phone again. Can i get a WOOT. And a HUZZAH and a HELL TO THE YEAH? Someone stole my phone while princess was in the PICU on the 16-17 (more on that drama later). And I had to get a new one (screw you, someone. And good luck using a BB that's been registered as stole
n. Dick.). But hey! Good news! This phone let's me blog! Can I get a WOOT...wait,did I already say that?

omg, the awesomeness

2009-07-11T14:54:00.002-05:00

a real entry. can ya'll believe it? i am PSYCHED. my blackberry storm is supposed to let me blog, and it did at first, but now it won't and i'm unsure if it's the phone or blogger. whatever. i blame clinton.
so how IS everyone? my kid turned SEVEN yesterday. i feel like i qualify for aarp or something. SEVEN. how is that possible? he's so big now! and ella is right behind him. she wears almost as much as him and wears tutus and petticoats all day, her "geautifuls" and is very proud of them. the other day she terrorized the really sweet indian guys across the hall by showing them her belly. i was no help...i laughed so hard i cried. i had all of these really eloquent posts in my head about how much we love wichita and how psyched we are to move and carson's bday and global warming and whatever, but i dunno. i'm just not feeling it this second.
and now i may be a picu nurse. am i smart enough for that? get back to me on that. k?
and a belated CONGRATS to arwen for little fish!

happy 7th bday, wonderboy. may all your cake wishes come true. love, your mama.

2009-07-10T08:41:00.000-05:00

still here.& trying to blog from this god forsaken blackberry. eff you, verizon.

2009-06-13T14:24:00.000-05:00

im still alive but cant blog on a blackberry bc blogger keeps screwing me so im cheating and making this title an entry. kthxbai

2009-04-28T21:19:00.001-05:00

spin cycle...laugh in style

2009-02-20T12:43:00.002-06:00

okay, jen, so for today's spin i have two things that crack me up.
one, when we go to lane bryant and princess sees the bras, she gets all excited and screams "boobies! BOOBIES!" over and over. while shaking her chest back and forth.
two, at christmas we took the kids to this awesome light display in carthage missouri that the vietnamese catholic church puts on. it's amazing...acres of christmas lights in displays of biblical scenes. wonderboy asked who did the lights and i told him the vietnamese. a few seconds goes by, in which he's craning his head around, and then he says "but i don't see her," sounding disappointed. puzzled, j and i asked, "see who?" wonderboy, looking still, "beauty and the beast. she's not here!"
and that, ladies and gentlemen, is why i procreated.

eeg

2009-02-19T06:19:00.001-06:00

Have already been up for three hours, because carson has an eeg today to make sure his inability to pay attention isn't actually a seizure disorder. And while I don't really think it is, the "what if" monster and the "I have always hoped this wouldn't affect my children" monster are having great fun scratching at the glass. So. Pray for an uneventful brain wave please...in a good way. :) and speaking of prayers, keep cora's family there as well...they are on the path that every parent prays every night they will never have to face. And visit cora's playground...it's at etsy so you know it's cool. I bought princess the cora paige dollie last night. Please, please support this cause.

updated to add: carson's eeg went fine, and we will know the results in a couple of days. the tech made me leave the room, which made me unhappy because i know what a seizure looks like on an eeg and wanted to see if there were any. and then she wouldn't tell me--or even hint--if she saw any; "the dr. has to read it!" and i know--I KNOW--that's her job, but still. GRR.

the macs

2009-02-17T19:51:00.004-06:00

So I want you guys to meet this amazing family who has touched my heart with their courage and faith. http://www.themcclenahans.blogspot.com/ or http://www.corapaige.blogspot.com/. Please read and give generously to cora's playground.

spin cycle!!

2009-02-13T15:51:00.000-06:00

Hi! I get to join the spin cycle again! And my phone doesn't appear to have a control key so I can't link but what the hell...you all know who jen is anyway, right? So...I love my family. Which, you know, duh. But they have done so well with this move, just rolling with it. And it was a traumatic thing to have tp move again, in less than a year after moving the first time. For my job. Which almost ceased to be at thanksgiving due to poor money management from my old hospktal...they were going to close the peds floor. And wichita, 200 miles away, was the closest one. Yeah. So I wheedled and whined until jason said ok, and we re packed and yanked up roots and left our families behind. And I had anxiety attacks because I felt selfish and my landlords a bitch and my patients are dying and clearly I am NOT cut out for this, blah blah blah. And my kids hugged me and jason held much more than my hand, he held my SANITY and I love them so much.

holy hell batman!

2009-02-12T23:11:00.001-06:00

I can blog from my new phone! Whoo to the hoo! And
Wichita getting way cooler! And princess
and wonder boy (note the new blognames...take that porn surfers)are good!
princess peed in the potty
...once! And I am way too stupid for this phone and can't see what I am
typing and why is this effing keyboard so damn small??

down for the day

2009-01-25T13:39:00.002-06:00

ok, maybe i should actually type something next time before i hit "publish." feel free to use that helpful tidbit for yourself.
so i'm down in joplin for the day. got to see some people and get a break from work. it's nice to be back and i'm trying to fight the feeling that i miss it here. i've only been there been a month so it's not like i've been there long enough to give it a go, and there's no job to come back to even if i wanted to. gonna have to leave after awhile to head back up....3 hour drive SUCKS. nothing but oil drills to look at.
so i'm not homeless, which is nice. though my landlord had her assistant call me at 0857 to tell me to pay the rent by 0900 or i'd be evicted. who the HELL gives three minutes notice? i mean, really? i reminded her that the mail didn't come until three o'clock and that my first paycheck was being mailed---all things i had told her before--and so she said i had until three.
well thanks for that! maybe i could sign it over to the mail lady in the parking lot and she could just give me the cash! i didn't get it to them until three thirty but she took it and i wasn't evicted. but seriously.
i am totally moving when my 8 month lease is up. TOTALLY MOVING OUT. hate this place SO much. love the city, love my job (but the sadness of these kids' diagnoses is killing me by inches, sometimes) but the apartment makes it hard to love where i live.
so since i'm so freaking cheerful, what are you guys up to?

things are better

2009-01-14T12:57:00.004-06:00

*breathes sigh of relief while fighting the impulse to punch my landlord in the face.*

so. i think--THINK--things are better. but don't quote me because that could change. it turns out that if i don't pay my rent by friday i am, quote, evicted. however, i can pay a reinstatement fee to reinstate my lease and then i'm not, you know, homeless.
why could she not have told me that from the effing beginning? do ya'll know how much weight i've lost due to STRESS?? not that i should bitch about weight loss, but still. grr.

and Wonderboy won an award at his new school--complete with a certificate and a medal--for following directions. feel free to leave him a comment so i can read them to him, he will LOVE that. and Princess is a terror. 'nuf said. oh, and the diabetes educator thinks i should check her blood sugar bc some of her signs and symptoms point to having diabetes. which, you know, FUCK.
so.
things are better.
how are you?
oh, and i forgot. go over to clusterfook (can't link it bc it comes to her sales page, but that's the blog title) and give lisa some love. she just ended her chemo and went on hospice care and could use support right now. and visit catherine and give maria some support for poor beaner.

ok, so just real quick...

2009-01-07T12:32:00.002-06:00

while i'm on my "executive lunch" (insert snort here) i am writing real quick to let ya'll know that i'm alive, here in wichita. it's been a bumpy start, as those of u who follow my whining on twitter have probably already realized. we were almost evicted no less than nine days after we moved in because i didn't have the full month's rent until jan 16 and i had to literally cry and beg to not be thrown out into the streets with my children. oh, and for my possessions, since if i'm evicted i only have 3 days to get both our asses and our stuff out before my stuff becomes their stuff. so i get paid the 16, barring post office screw ups (which NEVER happens, right? RIGHT???) and i have to pay in full right then or i am homeless by the 17 and possessionless by the 19.
wow. so i have had a few major anxiety attacks. catherine, i'm gonna need that ativan now. kthxbye.
but wichita is really pretty and there seems to be lots to do, once you have money. which i'm told by jason will happen someday. just not today. or tomorrow. and the little THINGS to do just bog you down, ya know? it's insane. new post office, new tags and license (but no money, so the last two don't exist yet, sorry kansas) just blah blah blah the list goes on and on. the apartment isn't unpacked yet because i live in fear i won't get my check on the right day and we'll be homeless, and may need those cardboard boxes since they are probably bigger than my car.
aren't i lively today? ya'll missed me, didn't ya. snort.
but i have hope that a) our upstairs neighbors will become quadriplegics who will QUIT STOMPING ALL NIGHT PLEASE GOD PLEASE and b) things will iron out. because they have to. the entire fate of our family rests on my shoulders, because i'm the one with the job and i'm the one who moved us here. so if it doesn't work out, it's totally my fault.
but no pressure.